THE BROWN BAG: Simon N. Kirby, The Agent #5 – G-Man Comics

SIMON N. KIRBY, THE AGENT No. 5, June 2022

Providing an intriguing insight into the technological development of Simon N. Kirby’s cutting-edge super-suit inside the Federal Bureau of Investigation’s Washington D.C. field offices, Rik Offenberger’s script for “Aktion!” must have ticked a lot of boxes for comic book fans who simply enjoy pulse-pounding pugilism and decidedly dirty treachery. In fact, this twenty-page story is arguably pretty much faultless as it quickly grabs the reader by the scruff of the neck just as soon as disloyal laboratory assistant Mark Hollister cold-bloodedly murders poor Doctor Haas before the scientist has finished calibrating his latest ceramic trauma plate prototype.

Delightfully though, this publication isn’t simply about having the Rothlander Industries insider tackle the G-Men’s Quantico-educated leader in a one-on-one fist-fight either, with the Swastika-wearing Nazi villain soon being swapped out for the much more formidable Tigerstrike. Able to withstand an early onslaught by a number of the Agent’s best operatives, this villain’s assault upon the best the Super Service can provide is impressively mesmerizing, especially once it becomes clear that Tony Tarantino’s striped alter-ego isn’t at all phased by the sizeable number of Kirby’s fellow protagonists confronting him; “Like the man said, I could do this all day!”

Ably adding plenty of “Thwamm!”, “Thwomp!” and “Waauugghh!!” to these Caped Agent Program proceedings are the prodigious pencils of Alan Faria, which do a great job in both depicting the sheer busyness of the brutal battle and the plethora of colorfully-costumed combatants it contains. In addition, the artist is very good at illustrating the sheer sense of betrayal upon the “third-generation” F.B.I. Special Agent’s face and the hero’s determination to beat the Aryan Alliance’s disagreeable weretiger before he makes a bold escape underground.

Slightly more tongue-in-cheek is Offenberger’s “Twenty-One Candles”, an eight-pager whose opening birthday celebration scene and subsequent dance sequence at Club Baby Seals noticeably contrasts with the distinctly serious nature of this comic’s main narrative. Proficiently sketched by Dean Juliette, this tale provides plenty of spotlight upon some of the G-Men’s female members, such as Pocahontas, Maya Santiago, and the original Bette Noir. But suddenly turns disconcertingly dark upon the arrival of the colossal Xadrian and the mad deity’s grisly demise via Atomik Bombshell’s deadly microwaves.

The regular cover art of “SIMON N. KIRBY, THE AGENT” #5 by Alan Faria